on changing career paths

Me: We could become the pirates of the Iowa River!
Brooke: That sounds so very sad and pathetic.
Me: Well, it's not like there's any other rivers around.
Brooke: ...the Mississippi?
Me: That is a 45 minute drive away!
Brooke: ...okay, L, okay.
Me: Ain't nobody got time for that!

[a few minutes pass]

Me: Or we could become pirates of the Cedar River, but that's just as sad.
Brooke: Yeah that's...that's not much better.